im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
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