Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I wish life had little blips of pornography
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
How dare you question the sanctity of Chocolate-and-Porn day
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
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