??? When I first met her at the bar, she told me she was 23. After I bought her 3 shots of tequila, she told me she was really only 21. When we went back to my house, she said she was really only 19. She's still sleeping next to me butt naked. I'm afraid if she opens her mouth again I could be looking at 10 years.
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
remember.. you're not a homewrecker.. you're just creating options for him..
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
dad is drunk and texting us pictures of bread
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize
