I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Got drunk and passed out flintstone vitamins to everyone at the bar. I'm just so god damn motherly
I just realized that every possible way I walk to campus I walk by the house of someone I slept with
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
So much Jack, so little girl.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
I told him you forbid me to sleep with him so he needs to accept that.
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
This drink tastes like mosquito repellent.
Randomize
