Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
Whatever. He's going to tie me up tonight whether he wants to or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Before I left he insisted on serenading me with a ukalele. I might be a little bit in love
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
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