my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
Randomize