Christians are straight up FREAKS
i think my mom watched the whole time
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
Randomize
