I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
The wedding is over. Operation sleep with my step-sister has officially begun
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
Randomize