just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
People like you and me aren't meant to go this long without having sex
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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