Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
I'm spending tomorrow doing taxes and making jello shots. Is this adulthood?
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Randomize
