Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
It's not a walk of shame if you run
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
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