I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
I think I'm drunk. That wine was old. I found it behind the water heater next to the mouse poison.
I can't feel my brain.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
