she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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