i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
Omg. I just remembered my underwear is in my wallet
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
