i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
there are not enough nopes in the world for that situation.
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
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