What can I say...he's packing some serious heat down there. You wouldn't expect that looking at him, huh?
I guess God knew he was going to be bald...
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
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