she went to pee and i could hear her singing "Drip Drip Drop LIttle April Showers" from Bambi through the door.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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