I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Cracked my iPhone screen. Real bad. Girl from last night isn't ugly yet. Stop me if you still think she belongs under a bridge. You have 12 seconds.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
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