yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
He chucked my pickle at the bouncer. Fucker, I wanted that.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
