You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I'm riding shot gun after Shawn took a dump in a happy meal box because we were making record time.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
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