Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
so I told him I hadn't been laid since Bush was president. Right after he cums, he says "Welcome to the Obama Administration".
I made out with a bride-to-be last night at the bar. Jesus died for our sins right?
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
This is the fourth day in a row I've walked outside in the same pajamas. I think the neighbors have finally given up on judging me.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
There might be a dead possum in your bed, your roomate is extremely distressed!
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
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