Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Hurricane Harvey ruined my dick appt. WTF?!
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
