Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
What is a foreign vacation of stupidity without some fake names?
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize