It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
We played a 4 hour game of True American then we fucked on the floor for a couple hours Happy 20th to me
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
There's a 50-50 shot that I will wake up with an ass tattoo tomorrow.
So, just how hungover are you?
Not at all, surprisingly.
That has to be your X-Men power.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Randomize
