Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
That was the most comfortable bag of doritos I have ever slept on!
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
no it was
but you compared your dick to a female disney character
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
His mom knocked on the door during morning sex because we were being too loud...now i have to meet her for the first time
Randomize
