Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
Dude. Fucked her last night. Fucked her this morning. went downstairs for water. took 18 pack of Coors Light instead and took it back to my gf's. Got a blow job from her. Drinking the beer on my deck now. Best Day ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
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