So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
that sweater is a total boner killer. you might as well be wearing a wedding dress.
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
