So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
Randomize
