we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
I will pee on everything he values.
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
just licked the cheese off a burger. that high.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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