Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Yet again my drunken self has managed to find his way into the middle of nowhere with no shoes or recollection of what happened last night.
Then I guess you don't remember me driving you there after you tried making out with my girlfriend, dipshit.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Randomize
