This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I said:" get your jacket, get your beer and get the fuck out of here"
Firing someone with a rhyme is the new high point in my life.
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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