True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
How the fuck did I get small bruises all over my body?
Well you were laying on the couch naked after the girls left, staring into space, and I went over to the pool table and threw every ball as hard as I could at you from point blank range . You didn't flinch, blink, or scream for any of them. next time maybe you won't fuck my girl while I'm taking a shit
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
On Wednesday I'm putting wine in a water bottle and crashing Margaret thatchers funeral
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
