I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Dear god my vagina.
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