Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
I told him next time he kisses her to remember where that mouth has been...
How'd that go?
Hes on his way with a baseball bat...
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I'm getting paid over-time to sit on reddit and look at dicks and abs all day. I'm really happy right now.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
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