Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
i woke up with a grocery list signed by "the people who ate all your shit while you were passed out"
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I was getting sick from all the peanut butter I had to lick off
Stop bitching. YOU SHOULD FEEL BLESSED TO HAVE LICKED PEANUT BUTTER OFF OF THESE TOTTERS
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
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