It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
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I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
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nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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