2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
20 bottles of wine, 3 cases or beer, and 5 bottles in my kitchen... My parents are teasing me.
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
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