you guys were way drunker than both of me
I should be sponsored by Trojan
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
You didn't even properly utilize my pigtails.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
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