hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
It'll be a romanticized airport meeting until I'm judged for sitting on his face in the terminal
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
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