Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
