She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
the guy working at the drive-thru just asked me if i wanna bang after he gets off work tonight.
given your current drought situation, im genuinely curious to know what your answer was
i told him maybe and gave him my number. sad? probably. but even if the sex is bad maybe i'll get a free burger out of it
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
He called it restless penis syndrome. I call it cheating.
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
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