Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
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