I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
I dont even clean my room anymore .. i drunk proof it for when i come back smashed with a guy
I'm drinking with 3 chicks and 1 gay dude. 100% chance I'm getting laid and 75% chance I'll enjoy it.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
I woke up with a pinecone in my hair. A full pine cone.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Randomize
