I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Only a mothe r could love this liver
At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
The basket that the Naughty Easter bunny left for you at my house might keep us entertained for a little while...
You know its been a rough night when for a large portion of the evening you have accepted your death
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
well it got awkwardly quiet so i looked up, slapped his stomach, said "youre the best!" while pointing at him, and went right back to sucking his dick.
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
Randomize
