We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize