whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
He just fucked me into paralysis. can't feel my hands or face.
Randomize
