I don't usually arrange sex via text message
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
I just saw a homeless guy on rollerblades; I don't think I've ever felt sorrier for someone in my life.
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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