You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
What happened to fro yo and sex?
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
