How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
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