So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Randomize
