How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
I look over and the both of you are naked, and he's eating chicken nuggets off the floor
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
