My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
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